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   vivi (vivi@misskey.bubbletea.dev)'s status on Tuesday, 10-Dec-2024 18:19:28 JST vivi

   dreamt of someone ik last nite. i'm not gonna say who it was, just that i probably will be down horrendous for entire day

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     poggie ?️‍⚧️ (kim@linfan.moe)'s status on Tuesday, 10-Dec-2024 18:19:27 JST poggie ?️‍⚧️

     in reply to
     @vivi is there ever a day where you arent down bad?
     ANNA is UTOPIA!! likes this.
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     vivi (vivi@misskey.bubbletea.dev)'s status on Tuesday, 10-Dec-2024 23:26:35 JST vivi

     in reply to

     i need jesus so bad

     ANNA is UTOPIA!! likes this.
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     ANNA is UTOPIA!! (anathema@brain.worm.pink)'s status on Wednesday, 11-Dec-2024 21:52:54 JST ANNA is UTOPIA!!

     in reply to

     • :blobcatflower:
     • tl;dr
     @vivi @lucy @tldr
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     vivi (vivi@misskey.bubbletea.dev)'s status on Wednesday, 11-Dec-2024 21:52:55 JST vivi

     in reply to

     • :blobcatflower:

     @lucy@netzsphaere.xyz ### 4. Reversing Traditional Roles
     
     Finally, the idea that dominance and submission are not inherently tied to physical positioning, but instead are shaped by the emotional and psychological states of the individuals involved, opens up a broader understanding of these roles. In many intimate encounters, dominance and submission are fluid and interchangeable, shaped by the desires, boundaries, and emotional responses of both participants. Just as the person being pinned down might be choosing to embrace vulnerability, the person doing the pinning might be reacting to the other person’s cues and desires in a way that indicates a more submissive role.
     
     In fact, the person pinning their partner may be responding to an emotional need to dominate or control the situation, but this could also be a sign of an underlying submission to their own emotional impulses or desires. They may be responding to a deep-seated fear of inadequacy or the need for external validation, rather than genuinely asserting dominance over the other person. Their act of pinning could then be interpreted as an attempt to fulfill a need to assert control, which ultimately stems from a desire to shield themselves from emotional exposure and vulnerability.

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     vivi (vivi@misskey.bubbletea.dev)'s status on Wednesday, 11-Dec-2024 21:52:55 JST vivi

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     • :blobcatflower:

     @lucy@netzsphaere.xyz ### Conclusion
     
     Ultimately, the relationship between dominance and submission is far more complex than the simple physical roles typically assigned in intimate scenarios. The act of being pinned down does not necessarily equate to submission. Rather, it can be seen as an empowered, conscious choice that requires mastery over one’s own vulnerability and emotions. Similarly, pinning another person down could reflect an emotional need for control, which may ultimately reveal a form of submission to one’s insecurities. Power dynamics are not static or solely physical; they are shaped by the emotional and psychological engagement of both participants. Dominance, in its truest form, lies not in physical restraint, but in the ability to control the emotional and psychological aspects of a relationship—whether one is the dominant or the submissive partner

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     vivi (vivi@misskey.bubbletea.dev)'s status on Wednesday, 11-Dec-2024 21:52:56 JST vivi

     in reply to

     • :blobcatflower:

     @lucy@netzsphaere.xyz
     
     ### 3. Dominance in Vulnerability
     
     The relationship between dominance and vulnerability is often more complex than conventional views allow. Common wisdom often suggests that the person in a vulnerable position is submissive, but vulnerability itself can be an expression of power. The act of being pinned down might reflect a different kind of dominance—one rooted in the mastery of one’s own vulnerability. Vulnerability is frequently misunderstood as weakness, yet it can be an incredibly powerful tool when wielded consciously. For the person who is pinned, choosing to surrender their physical agency in that moment might be an empowered decision. It takes a great deal of strength and control to allow oneself to be in a vulnerable state, trusting the other person while still maintaining a sense of control over one's emotions and responses.
     
     In this sense, the power of being pinned lies in the ability to let go while remaining emotionally anchored. The person in the vulnerable position is not necessarily submitting to the will of the other person; rather, they are choosing to let go in a moment of intimacy, knowing that they hold the power to influence how the interaction unfolds. On the other hand, the person who is pinning the other might feel a greater sense of insecurity, needing to control the situation to avoid feeling exposed themselves. This dynamic could reveal a hidden submissiveness, where the act of pinning down someone else is more about controlling the other person to avoid confronting one’s own fears or emotional vulnerabilities.

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     vivi (vivi@misskey.bubbletea.dev)'s status on Wednesday, 11-Dec-2024 21:52:57 JST vivi

     in reply to

     • :blobcatflower:

     @lucy@netzsphaere.xyz
     ### 1. Control Over the Situation
     
     One of the key arguments for why being pinned down might not automatically be submissive comes from the perspective of control. While physical restraint may suggest a loss of control, it does not necessarily equate to a lack of agency. Consider the psychological aspect of intimate encounters, where the interaction can be influenced as much by emotional and cognitive factors as by physical acts. A person who is pinned might still exert control over the dynamic through their verbal cues, non-verbal communication, or the pace at which the interaction progresses. For instance, they might dictate the tempo of the kiss, decide when to deepen or break away, or subtly guide the actions of the person pinning them down. In this case, the pinned individual could be in a position of control, subtly guiding the interaction despite their physical vulnerability.
     
     Additionally, this dynamic is not confined to a physical sense of control but extends into emotional and psychological realms. The person pinned down might have the ultimate power to stop or redirect the course of the interaction. Through the power of their decisions, feedback, and influence over the encounter, they maintain the role of the dominant partner, even if they are physically restrained. In this view, the dominant position is less about brute physicality and more about control over the experience itself.

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     vivi (vivi@misskey.bubbletea.dev)'s status on Wednesday, 11-Dec-2024 21:52:57 JST vivi

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     • :blobcatflower:

     @lucy@netzsphaere.xyz
     ### 2. Mastery Through Surrender
     
     Another layer of complexity in understanding dominance and submission comes from the idea of "mastery through surrender." In many power dynamics, particularly within BDSM culture, submission is not simply about relinquishing control but about having the emotional and psychological capacity to do so. Surrendering in an intimate encounter often requires a great deal of trust, emotional security, and self-awareness. The act of allowing oneself to be pinned down or restrained can be seen as an act of mastery in its own right.
     
     From this perspective, the person who is pinned may be actively choosing to embrace vulnerability as part of a controlled, deliberate experience. This choice is rooted in a level of self-assurance and confidence that is often associated with dominance. They are not helplessly submitting; rather, they are exercising their own agency in deciding to allow the interaction to unfold in this way. By controlling the decision to submit, they maintain an underlying sense of power, showing that true dominance can reside in the ability to embrace and control vulnerability.
     
     In contrast, the person who does the pinning may not necessarily feel the same degree of emotional mastery. While they may be physically dominant, their need to restrain someone else could reflect an insecurity or a deeper emotional need to assert control. In this sense, they may be driven by a fear of losing power or a need to affirm their dominance through external actions, rather than through an internal sense of confidence or control. Thus, their act of pinning could be seen as an attempt to cover up underlying insecurities, which can be construed as an act of submission to their own fears and anxieties.

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     vivi (vivi@misskey.bubbletea.dev)'s status on Wednesday, 11-Dec-2024 21:52:58 JST vivi

     in reply to

     • :blobcatflower:

     @lucy@netzsphaere.xyz i completely disagree. here is a thread on why you are wrong [1/?]

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     vivi (vivi@misskey.bubbletea.dev)'s status on Wednesday, 11-Dec-2024 21:52:58 JST vivi

     in reply to

     • :blobcatflower:

     @lucy@netzsphaere.xyz
     
     Rethinking Dominance and Submission: An Argument for the Subversive Nature of Being Pinned Down
     
     In most common interpretations of power dynamics, physical control during intimate moments is often used to define the roles of dominance and submission. The person who pins the other down is typically seen as occupying the "dominant" or "top" position, while the one who is pinned is regarded as the "submissive" or "bottom." However, this framework simplifies the complexity of human interactions and overlooks deeper psychological and emotional elements that contribute to the ultimate understanding of dominance. By delving into the nuances of power dynamics, it becomes apparent that being pinned down could, in fact, signify dominance, while pinning another person could be an act of submission

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     vivi (vivi@misskey.bubbletea.dev)'s status on Wednesday, 11-Dec-2024 21:53:00 JST vivi

     in reply to

     uguuuu

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     :blobcatflower: (methyltheobromine@netzsphaere.xyz)'s status on Wednesday, 11-Dec-2024 21:53:00 JST :blobcatflower:

     in reply to
     @vivi not very top like of you
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     vivi (vivi@misskey.bubbletea.dev)'s status on Wednesday, 11-Dec-2024 21:53:01 JST vivi

     in reply to

     i just keep thinking abt her pinning me down and

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     tl;dr (tldr@fuzzies.wtf)'s status on Wednesday, 11-Dec-2024 21:53:04 JST tl;dr

     in reply to

     • ANNA is UTOPIA!!

     @anathema TL;DR: Vivi had a dream about someone pinning her down and argues that being pinned down doesn't automatically mean being submissive; it can be an act of controlled vulnerability and a form of dominance.

     ANNA is UTOPIA!! likes this.