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   JNL (jnl@hcommons.social)'s status on Wednesday, 20-Nov-2024 22:00:45 JST JNL

   in reply to

   people think 'autistic as in nonverbal' or 'autistic as in verbal and physical stims' and not 'autistic as in totally comfortable on stage singing the male lead in the musical' and 'autistic as in sorry I just swept all the academic awards' and 'autistic as in the fun, zany friend in the group who's relied on for a listening ear'

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     JNL (jnl@hcommons.social)'s status on Wednesday, 20-Nov-2024 22:00:45 JST JNL

     in reply to

     I've talked about this before in different ways, but not explicitly connected to autism- extended time at home (2 years in our case; thanks Covid!) in his middle school years was SO TREMENDOUSLY HELPFUL for our kid in fully getting it together on some lagging skills (organization, motivation toward meeting other people's priorities), to the point that I honestly think more people parenting autistic kids might want to consider this if they can swing it.

     He came back in batting at the top of his class and understanding in a really profound way that HE was in charge of his learning 'I can teach myself anything I want! I can learn anything!' and that made him MUCH more legible to teachers and admins in a position to help him thrive. Public schools at this point are really, REALLY widgety in their functioning, but they are still deployments of PEOPLE harnessing resources and pathways. It is sometimes (and for academically gifted autistic kids, probably often) worth it to code legibly.

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     JNL (jnl@hcommons.social)'s status on Wednesday, 20-Nov-2024 22:00:46 JST JNL

     in reply to

     If we don't find better, more complex, and more differentiated ways of talking about autism, then kids like our son will forever code only as 'doesn't seem actually autistic,' not because he's not neuro-diverse, but because the 'illness' view of autism is flattening as fuck

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     JNL (jnl@hcommons.social)'s status on Wednesday, 20-Nov-2024 22:00:47 JST JNL

     Our older son is autistic in the 'kicks your ass at everything' kind of way.

     Rich Felker repeated this.