So, my #federation issue with #pleroma <-> #mastodon was the following:
Under https://feministwiki.org/.well-known/host-meta I had included the following:
<Link rel="lrdd" template="https://fedi.feministwiki.org/.well-known/webfinger?resource={uri}" />Hoping that this would make other servers query fedi.feministwiki.org instead of feministwiki.org for Webfinger queries.
Correspondingly, I did NOT bother to redirect feministwiki.org/.well-known/webfinger to fedi.feministwiki.org/.well-known/webfinger because I thought this would be redundant.
However, comes out some other servers are stupid, and still query feministwiki.org directly for Webfinger. So it didn't work. It seems to have made users on my server (just me) effectively invisible to Mastodon servers. Probably because the failing Webfinger query made them error out during any attempted interaction.
I just hope that having fixed this post-hoc didn't cause any permanent issues. For example, when some people on other Pleroma-based instances (including Soapbox/Rebased) message me, their mention of me sometimes appears as @taylan@fedi.feministwiki.org instead of @taylan@feministwiki.org but I don't know if that's caused by the above, or whether it's just a simple display issue with PleromaFE. From my old Pleroma instance, I can simply mention @taylan@feministwiki.org and it correctly pings me here.
@hj @feld Pinging you guys just in case this knowledge helps you somehow. (And maybe you have something to say about my worries in the last paragraph above.)
The Pleroma docs do say to redirect example.org Webfinger requests to subdomain.example.org (instead of putting subdomain.example.org into the host-meta file like I did). I thought I was doing something smart... Maybe the docs should explicitly mention that this won't work, in case others are being smartasses like me?