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   terra - jolly bitch (terraboops@girlcock.club)'s status on Sunday, 08-Sep-2024 06:59:19 JST terra - jolly bitch

   taking #feminizationfriday off this week.

   sept 6 i am going to talk about my thoughts on authenticity and social pressures.

   keep being magnificently queer to each other ❤️☺️

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     terra - jolly bitch (terraboops@girlcock.club)'s status on Sunday, 08-Sep-2024 06:58:30 JST terra - jolly bitch

     in reply to

     i didn't get medical support until 18 months into the process, despite starting out on the coast where there were a lot more trans-competent doctors. this was mainly because i had incorrect ideas about how fast HRT would work and at what point there would be irreversible changes.

     arguably it was my own fear that stopped me, but that fear was grounded in misinformation and lack of information.

     it's sad how many times i have held back my true self because of misinformation.

     #feminizationfriday

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     terra - jolly bitch (terraboops@girlcock.club)'s status on Sunday, 08-Sep-2024 06:58:32 JST terra - jolly bitch

     in reply to

     but it wasn't always my internalized transphobia keeping me back. in the early days of transition, i didn't have many trans people in my direct support network, so i lacked the information necessary to overcome anxiety around some decisions early on.

     i was pretty sure i wanted HRT from the start, but i had heard a lot of conflicting information about the effects amd consequences.

     my ideas about HRT were so misguided back then...

     #feminizationfriday

     Mr. Bill repeated this.
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     terra - jolly bitch (terraboops@girlcock.club)'s status on Sunday, 08-Sep-2024 06:58:35 JST terra - jolly bitch

     in reply to

     okay, back to it. so far i covered how i have approached authenticity at different times in my transition.

     now, ill talk about the ways i have delayed my transition because i wasn't committed to authenticity.

     internalized transphobia kept me from realizing my authentic self for 20+ years. during that time i became very good at lying to myself and not questioning too deeply why i did many things i did to survive untreated gender dysphoria.

     #feminizationfriday

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     terra - jolly bitch (terraboops@girlcock.club)'s status on Sunday, 08-Sep-2024 06:58:38 JST terra - jolly bitch

     in reply to

     more importantly, having an emotional guidance system meant that i led myself to places that i wanted to go and places where i was accepted for me.

     i made better friends and actually kept them. i got myself out of situations before they became toxic.

     this is why authenticity is now a requirement for me; i only accept situations where i cannot me fully authentic if i have to and it has to be worth it... otherwise i might as well be cis!

     #feminizationfriday

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     terra - jolly bitch (terraboops@girlcock.club)'s status on Sunday, 08-Sep-2024 06:58:44 JST terra - jolly bitch

     in reply to

     setting my GPS to joy means to do more of what i love.

     try to avoid stuff that doesn't bring me joy and seek out stuff that does.

     the surprising part about this was that seeking out my joy became much easier during transition. when i stopped dissociating because of gender dysphoria, i could actually feel things... and when i took HRT my emotional range increased.

     #feminizationfriday

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     terra - jolly bitch (terraboops@girlcock.club)'s status on Sunday, 08-Sep-2024 06:58:50 JST terra - jolly bitch

     in reply to

     when i started with my focus on authenticity, it was simply a reaction to the realization: i didn't know who i was (e.g. i thought i was a dude previously) and i had to grow up from a baby girl to a woman suddenly in my 30s -- who did i want to be?

     it seemed to me that the only way to find out who i was and who i wanted to be was to explore my authenticity.

     my approach: "setting my GPS to joy"

     #feminizationfriday

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     terra - jolly bitch (terraboops@girlcock.club)'s status on Sunday, 08-Sep-2024 06:58:57 JST terra - jolly bitch

     in reply to

     i really didn't have an understanding of authenticity before realizing i was trans. it was a concept i was familiar with, hypothetically... but i really didn't know how to approach it. my emotional range was so narrow and i was so out of touch with my feelings.

     once i realized and accepted i was trans, authenticity became a primary focus. once i realized how important authenticity was to my happiness and thriving, i made it top priority.

     #feminizationfriday

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     terra - jolly bitch (terraboops@girlcock.club)'s status on Sunday, 08-Sep-2024 06:59:05 JST terra - jolly bitch

     in reply to

     finished with dinner, time to write about authenticity and social pressures. as always i will speak from my own perspective and i offer it, not as advice, but to share my experience. if you find it helpful, use it- otherwise put it back and forget it.

     there's no right or wrong way to be trans, but i have certainly made missteps in my transition.

     i will start tonight by talking about how i've approached authenticity throughout transition.

     #feminizationfriday

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     terra - jolly bitch (terraboops@girlcock.club)'s status on Sunday, 08-Sep-2024 06:59:13 JST terra - jolly bitch

     in reply to

     for #feminizationfriday later tonight, i am going to chat about my thoughts on authenticity and social pressures during transition.

     - how i approach authenticity
     - the ways i have delayed my transition
     - social pressures i would navigate differently
     - mitigating social pressures