I'm announcing a bounty: I'll wire or venmo $100 to whoever fixes this:
https://github.com/dotnet/msbuild/issues/7988
I'm angry that such an impactful bug has been sitting open for a year and a half, and I absolutely don't have time to fix it myself, otherwise I would have fixed it long ago. I just can't do it all myself.
So, if anyone wants an extra green benjamin, it would be very helpful!