So before I make this next post, I want to be clear that I personally hate April Fool's Day. The essence of humor is surprise. There is no surprise in April Fool's Day! Everyone's actively bracing for it! April Fool's Day on the Internet has long since stopped being about "jokes" and devolved into a series of exhausting, repetitive, occasionally-cruel pranks, often enacted by the world's biggest corporations against the captive audience of their customers.
But anyway