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There's no way out for me. The only thing left for me to do is get on the SNL board of writers and write a skit about some guy whose balls really itch and drag it out like six or seven minutes where there's like this implicit layer of misogyny in a female character saying something obviously unhelpful and the guy responding like "sharon, my BALLS FUCKING ITCH" to a laugh track replicated in the homes of millions of viewers. It needs to follow the classic beginning - conflict - resolution arc that serves to make it predictable for We$$tern audiences. There needs to be some apparent message about supporting male vulnerability or whatever even as the skit itself does the exact opposite. You see now? This is a dance of death more high-level than anything I have ever done.