Conversation

It's ok to not be ok
To fold, to crumple up into a ball on the floor
And cry like the tears will put out fires
It's ok to give up, to surrender
Some towels exist to be thrown in
I once had so much to lose, and I did
Car, home, job, friends, family
None of it really matters
I joined a vagabond cult
Lived in national forests for 2 years
Off the scraps of capitalism
And the kindness of others
I found new friends, I chose a new family
More than once, even
I've walked away so many times
From so many exploitative jobs
Opportunistic acquaintances
I know that 4 walls don't make a home
And time spent doesn't make people close
My debt will disappear when I'm gone
My regrets, my pain, my suffering
Will all wash away
I cling to this current state of being
For those who care about me
But nothing scares me anymore