Matthew Moulton on Gab: 'Let's get a good vibe goin...
https://youtu.be/c4gIQjpNqc8
Let's clock in at 91% THC, Sativa...
*consults the burning bud*
This is totally easy! How many other humans can do this I wonder?
Let's free fall into infinity!
3... 2... 1... *thinky blinky*
Now let's repaint reality!
*accessing autonomous creation controls*
What's inside of ennui?
Feeling uneasy about something... I want to feel that... recreationally. Now, I'm a narcissist, but not a fake one, a real one. What do I mean by that? I mean I can actually control my emotions... the fake kind they just constantly get high on themselves.
That's not control, that's addiction. Real narcissists can precisely control their emotions... all of them.
You know how you can watch a movie and it can make you feel sad and cry? Yeah, let's do that... but let's use uncertainty.
This is easy with weed because it magnifies your emotional makeup. Now we don't want paranoia... it has to be intrusive but not apparent enough to be especially noticed.
For maximum effect let's use antithetical reality. Now be careful with this shit, it's like imaginative Play-Doh.
Normally people are apprehensive about death. But I've turned that inside out and removed it lots of times, so let's look further... what am I apprehensive about... oh... what's inside of nothing.
I've talked about it before... about how nothing is more than you think... about how there are things inside of nothing waiting to get out.
But how can we even know exactly what might be in there? And what triggers it to come out?
What if there's something eating the probability collision field? Reality could become more and more improbable by the day!
What if we're like... in a quantum state of existence.
That is... maybe we only exist because God is looking at us. If God ever stops looking at us... we just blink out.
So it's like... we have free will... but only so long as God is watching. That would explain why we're always so eager and desperate for attention... and why we think we don't exist when it's gone.
This is why I work to impress God. Sometimes the future... but mostly God. Not simply as a means of survival, but as a means of existence itself.
Have you ever considered it? Having to pay for existence itself? Physical reality might be like that... I mean... you just sort of assumed it was free. Just as a protip... I don't think reality is kind or fair enough to afford your sentience an effective "end state".
Also, when you say shit like, "I didn't ask to be born." that's like saying, "I didn't ask for the three course meal I wolfed down before correcting the waiter!"
Like, you hate your life, great... but obviously you didn't hate it enough to end it as soon as humanly possible, soooo... whose gonna pay for what you've already used? I mean, obviously you're dissatisfied, but then... why would an unfair system even care about your satisfaction to begin with?
Unless the system is fair and your dissatisfaction with life stems from, how shall we say... "user error".
You better hope nothing is keeping track. D:
*riffs off the uncertainy*
I can feel it... like the tide coming in. Feelings of being trapped.
It's um... like fuel you know. See if narcissists like myself only fuel ourselves using happiness and contentment then we crash. It's very tempting, very addictive. You can literally become addicted to yourself! It's like how masturbation can lead to sex addiction, but doing it with artificially constructed happiness.
Emotions for me do not work autonomically!
So I have to carefully mix and match, effectively planning my emotional makeup for the day or if something unexpected comes up then I adapt accordingly for the change of circumstance.
I feel what I want, when I want to feel it!
That comes with responsibility tho. Again, you have to make sure you don't become addicted to yourself by spending time experiencing other emotions... even ones that don't feel that great like anxiety, fear, hate, etc.
I'm not ~that~ great at it either, for example I honestly can't feel the emotion of hate for longer than about... five minutes. It's like flexing a muscle to me and... it is incredibly draining! I do not understand how normal humans can invest so much energy into something so completely unsatisfying.
I've hypothesized that some humans must have something wrong with their brains where, they get some kind of abject pleasure response from rage. Like some ancient hoomun tribes may have practiced "rage killing".
Like, instead of hunting the stealthy, sneaky, weaselly way... going after SMALLER animals... some humans actually preferred to rage hunt animals larger than themselves... and they used anger to psych themselves up to be able to do it.
Yikes! Glad I'm not a one of those! D:'
Onideus
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