Notices by Terrybot :pratchett: (terrybot@frikiverse.zone), page 2

- "What shall I do?"
- "Well, if you see anything crawl out of the sea and try to breathe, you could try telling it not to bother."

Rincewind and Eric at the Beginning of Time
Terry Pratchett, Eric

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"Take it from me, whenever you see a bunch of buggers puttering around talking about truth and beauty and the best way of attacking Ethics, you can bet your sandals it's all because dozens of other poor buggers are doing all the real work around the place."

Terry Pratchett, Small Gods

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"Did I hear things, or can that little dog speak?" said Dibbler.
"He says he can't," said Victor. Dibbler hesitated.
"Well," he said, "I suppose he should know."

Dibbler meets Gaspode the Wonder Dog
Terry Pratchett, Moving Pictures

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For animals, the entire universe has been neatly divided into things to (a) mate with, (b) eat, (c) run away from, and (d) rocks.

Terry Pratchett, Equal Rites

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People who didn't need people needed people around to know that they were the kind of people who didn't need people.

Terry Pratchett, Maskerade

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PEOPLE'S WHOLE LIVES *DO* PASS IN FRONT OF THEIR EYES BEFORE THEY DIE. THE PROCESS IS CALLED 'LIVING'.

Terry Pratchett, The Last Continent

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The maze was so small that people got lost looking *for* it.

Bloody Stupid Johnson at his finest
Terry Pratchett, Men at Arms

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"You can't go around building a better world for people. Only people can build a better world for people. Otherwise it's just a cage."

Terry Pratchett, Witches Abroad

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In fact, the mere act of opening the box will determine the state of the cat, although in this case there were three determinate states the cat could be in: these being Alive, Dead, and Bloody Furious.

Schrodinger's Moggy explained
Terry Pratchett, Lords and Ladies

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The Patrician was a pragmatist. He never tried to fix things that worked. Things that didn't work, however, got broken.

Terry Pratchett, Soul Music

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They both savoured the strange warm glow of being much more ignorant than ordinary people, who were only ignorant of ordinary things.

Discworld scientists at work
Terry Pratchett, Equal Rites

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The people who really run organizations are usually found several levels down, where it is still possible to get things done.

Terry Pratchett, Small Gods

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A good bookshop is just a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read.

Terry Pratchett, Guards! Guards!

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Most alchemists were nervous, in any case; it came from not knowing what the crucible of bubbling stuff they were experimenting with was going to do next.

Terry Pratchett, Moving Pictures

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I LIKE TO THINK I AM A PICKER-UP OF UNCONSIDERED TRIFLES. Death grinned hopefully.

Terry Pratchett, Lords and Ladies

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Ankh-Morpork had dallied with many forms of government and had ended up with that form of democracy known as One Man, One Vote. The Patrician was the Man; he had the Vote.

Discworld politics explained
Terry Pratchett, Mort

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1) I have never waved a hankie in anger 2) I do not peronally know any Morris dancers 3) But Morris dancing is kind of funny and weird at the same time.

Terry Pratchett, alt.fan.pratchett

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Mind you, the Elizabethans had so many words for the female genitals that it is quite hard to speak a sentence of modern English without inadvertently mentioning at least three of them.

Terry Pratchett, alt.fan.pratchett

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A day ago the future had looked aching and desolate, and now it looked full of surprises and terror and bad things happening to people... If she had anything to do with it anyway.

Granny Weatherwax commits optimism
Terry Pratchett, Maskerade

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- "The other humans around it are trying to explain to it what a planet is."
- "Doesn't it know?"
- "Many humans don't. Mistervicepresident is one of them."

Terry Pratchett, Wings

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