@dommymommy I just... do. idk, over the last year I've gone from the least burdened and most mentally healthy and aware and cope/trauma-free person I know, to a mess. and with that I've lost my personality and I think a lot of it is due to coming back into social life here and trying to fit in even though obviously I shouldn't fall down to their level or even try to be friends given they're fundamentally different from me and bring absolutely no value to me. and of course I can't really be honest about myself to others, which makes it even worse

and I've stopped being able to draw really, I mean not the ability itself but the ability to come up with anything and just draw. I have trouble even talking to people online. idk. not much of a reason to it, that's the worst thing about it. just randomly started declining